Friday, June 18, 2010

London Screenwriters' Festival

£299 for three days of ramming my head full of lovely screenwriting knowledge. I am so going! But how to afford it? I've just gone self employed so money is tighter than a duck's bum hole in winter.

Steal? Potential for an instantly large gain, but also a big risk of finding myself at Her Majesty's pleasure at the time of the festival. VERDICT - DON'T BEND DOWN FOR THE SOAP TYPE LOSE

Sell everything I own? I don't own anything of significant value that I can sell, except the wife and child, but I'm sure human trafficking is illegal. VERDICT - LOSE

Beg? I'm old and my knees hurt. If I got down on them I'm not sure I'd get back up again. VERDICT - LOSE & POSSIBLE PERMANENT INJURY

Borrow? My bank manager laughed at me when I asked, and my parents left the country the next day. VERDICT - LOSER!!!

Sell Vital Organs? I'm already in trouble for having three kidneys and two livers on eBay. VERDICT - DEAD

Actually Sell Some Work? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. VERDICT - YEAH RIGHT

Charity? www.FundDomToGoToLondonScreenwritersFestival.com VERDICT - ASKING SCRIPTWRITERS FOR MONEY...NO CHANCE

My only choice seems to be to sneak over the wall on the day.

Who's with me?

4 comments:

Elinor said...

I'm with you Dom!

Jared said...

I'll bring the pole vault.

We can re-enact Clouseau trying to breach the castle walls, a la Pink Panther Strikes Again.

Anonymous said...

So with you on that. When I heard it was £299 a heavy depression fell. To be honest, I'd rather use that money to actively pitch my scripts via Virtual Pitchfest.

So saving my cash - not much from DWP - to do just that in October.

Dominic Carver said...

Jonathan, it's worth the money just for the networking opportunities. My career has moved on so much since the last time I went...I have to go again.