LOW BUDGET - POOR QUALITY?

I bought a DVD of a low budget film last week. The cover looked good, the trailer looked great, the cast looked fantastic... but for all the production value obviously poured into the film there was still something lacking... a decent script.

There are some great, well written and very entertaining low budget films out there, but there is also a lot of dross. I can't understand why this is because I know for a fact there are a lot of up and coming, very talented writers out there desperate for a break, so why are low budget films still being made with substandard screenplays?

The one I watched last week was written, directed and edited by the same person. The visuals were excellent, something you would find on a film with a higher budget, it was well shot and acted yet the plot didn't match up to the rest of the effort put in. Why? Was it an ego trip on behalf of the director, that he felt he needed to write the screenplay too, to keep control of his vision? Surely he knew the screenplay was lacking? I can't believe for a moment he didn't care, not when he had taken so much time and obvious effort over the rest of the film. So why not put the same effort into the screenplay?

The thing that bugged me most about the film was the fact there was about thirty minutes of scenes repeating exactly the same thing, getting over the same point again and again with different characters and introducing new characters late on to hammer home the same point. And the worse thing is it did it all with dialogue and not with action. In truth only one of those scenes were needed. Just one. That's roughly twenty-seven minutes of film wasted on nothing.

I really don't understand why anyone would risk making something that is less than brilliant when it's their reputation on the line. There really is no excuse, there are plenty of writers out there who can produce a script worthy of your efforts, so why not use them?

It's what we do.

It's all we do.

Give a new writer the opportunity to show you what they can do. I'm sure they will surprise you. At the very least have a professional reader take a look at your script and give you notes on how it can be improved, then work on it.

Directors, don't just settle for any old script just because you wrote it and want to retain control. That way you're spreading yourself too thin. Concentrate on what you're good at and let us writers do what we do best, then there will be many more high quality low budget films to come.

SUPPORTING YOUR PEERS

I have always considered the film and TV industry, and especially fellow writers, as a community, one massive family, a support network I can rely on when I'm having an off day. As creatives we all jump over the same hurdles to get our passion projects and visions up there on the screen and experience the same pain and frustration when we don't quite make it, so when someone I know has overcome all obstacles to actually finish something, then I'm damn well going to make sure I support them in some way or another.

Recently there was the DVD and Blu-ray launch of STALLED, directed by Christian James and written by and starring Dan Palmer, a superb comedy horror that knocks the socks off pretty much anything else out there at the moment. So to support Dan and Christian I not only bought a copy of the DVD I also posted this picture of me with it on Facebook.

My hilarious attempt to help promote the STALLED DVD release. 

My wife thought I was mad! Christian said I went above and beyond the call of duty! To be honest I don't mind embarrassing myself to help promote something I thoroughly enjoyed. Dan and Christian did an amazing job and I can't wait to see what they come up with next.

Then last night I went to see DRUNK ON LOVE, screened at Lighthouse Poole, as part of Indie Screen Dorset. Even though I've already seen the film once it was great to see it again on the big screen and see how others reacted to it, and of course support producer Ben Richardson and writer/director David Bryant. I'd previously spoken to them via email and Messenger and it was wonderful to meet them in the flesh and have a good natter about their work, how it's being received and what they are working on next.

So if you have a feature due for cinematic or DVD release, or you have a TV episode due to air, email me about it, as I'm always interested in seeing what other people are up to.

DEFERRED PAYMENT

You're offered your first feature commission. You're super excited. Then the producer tells you it will be on a deferred payment basis. Do you panic, throw your dummy out of the pram and demand payment up front? No... and here's why.

I've seen plenty of new writers on the web tell other new writers they should never work for free and they should always ask for payment upfront. Absolute nonsense! They are probably still wondering why they have yet to land a commission themselves.

As a new writer it would be almost impossible to get paid upfront for your first commission. Your writing might be awesome and the best they've ever seen, but you're untried and you don't have any box office figures to back up your talent. Therefore you're considered a risk and no one is going to pay you upfront because of this.

Most features are paid on a deferred payment basis, especially low budget features. The producer doesn't want to pay out his own money if the project never makes it to production. And why should he? Doing this for even just one project could lead to that producer being bankrupt.

So for a writer it's a gamble to write a screenplay for a deferred payment. If it doesn't get funding or go into production you'll never see a penny. It's also a risk for the producer, relying on the strength of your talent to provide the funding to get your words shot. But it's a risk worth taking.

Writing that first commission on a deferred payment gets you off the ground. It gets you a credit. It launches your career. You can put it on your CV. So what if it doesn't get funding and never gets made, producers know projects fail to get funding, or get made, all the time. You were commissioned to write something, that says something about you. Fingers crossed your screenplay gets funded and goes into production within a couple of years and you get paid. Happy days if it does!

Sometimes though it won't get funding and you won't get paid, but at least you'll still have the experience of writing to a brief and a deadline to fall back on for your next commission. You could always ask the producer for a small payment up front, a couple of thousand maybe, just to help with your living expenses while you write the screenplay. Most producers will understand and won't mind you asking. You might even get lucky and find they do pay you an advance.

Remember it's easier for the producer to get funding if he has a script ready to go and a lot more difficult if he doesn't. Would you part with your money for just an idea? Then why should they?

GUEST BLOG - THE DECISION

THE DECISION: LIZZIE’S STORY

A prochoice-orientated novel & transmedia series,"Lizzie's Diary" playing out in real time on Twitter & Facebook, COMING IN MARCH 2014!!

 

A 17 yo young woman with a bright academic future discovers she's pregnant and is faced with ALL of the possible outcomes of her decision: abortion; miscarriage; single parenthood, etc.

 

WHAT IF … you could play out everything that *could* happen next in your life?

 

The bright Lizzie, 17, has big plans, but can she have the life she wanted, with a baby in tow? What will her family and friends say? And what will the baby’s father choose to do: stay out of it, or stand by her? 

 

Working on the notion some moments in time are unchangeable, Lizzie will find herself pregnant, then have to choose what to do next. Lizzie will be presented with ALL of the possible scenarios and discover some are not as bad as they seem and others worse than she imagines.

 

It’s 2014, but the issue of teenage pregnancy is STILL stereotyped and oversimplified by the media and politicians: "On average, we think teenage pregnancy is 25 times higher than official estimates:  we think that 15% of girls under 16 get pregnant each year, when official figures suggest it is around 0.6%[i]." SOURCE: Ipsos Mori 

 

The novel will be available to buy at Amazon & all good bookshops. Find THE DECISION: LIZZIE'S STORY in the German Language,  BAUCHENTSCHEIDUNG (“Gut Decision”) & Hay’s previous books, here.

 

Don't miss out on this online event … Follow Lizzie: she is tweeting as @LizziesDecision. "Like" the official Facebook page for Lizzie's Diary, coming soon.

 

MORE INFORMATION: Contact Julian Friedmann on Julian@blakefriedmann.co.uk or Lucy Hay on Bang2write@aol.com

OPPORTUNITIES

It's not enough to just have a talent as a writer to get ahead, you also need to recognise and take your opportunities when they are presented to you. If you don't, several years from now, when you're sitting in your freezing cold bedsit, you'll still be wondering why your career hasn't gone anywhere.

Every opportunity has to be grabbed and made the most off, because if you don't take them then someone else will. There are tens of thousands of writers out there all trying to grow a career and you have to make yourself stand out from the crowd. You might overload yourself with work at first but as you grow as a writer and become more experienced, you'll get to know which opportunities are the ones to pursue and which are the ones to politely decline.

Of course opportunities very rarely appear out of thin air and the vast majority have to be worked for. Making connections, collaborations, occasionally working for free and making yourself invaluable to other media types will go a long way towards this. If you get a reputation for being helpful, polite and good to work with, the opportunities will soon flow your way. You don't need to go looking for them.

A successful writer grabs every opportunity and makes the most of it. An unsuccessful writer doesn't. Which are you?

TIME AWAY

Just finished a draft? What do you do now?

Send your script out to two or three people you trust to give you constructive feedback, then save it and forget about it. That's right, forget about your screenplay. When you get your feedback hide that away too. Whatever you do don't send your script out, it's not ready despite how well polished you think it might be. New writers make this mistake far too often and here's why it's a bad thing to do.

You've been working hard on your script, close to it for weeks, maybe even months. The temptation to say, 'Ah, it's done,' is overwhelming sometimes, but because you have been so closely focused on the screenplay you have become blind to any faults it has. You need time away, to have a breather and get a fresh perspective on things. Too many new writers, and believe me I've done this myself, see a competition deadline coming and start writing a few weeks before it, rushing to get the screenplay completed. By doing this they don't give the work enough time to grow and they often wonder why the don't do well in competitions. The reason is simple; your screenplay isn't ready and though you may be blind to its faults, the reader won't be. It's better to start several months before the deadline, not a few weeks. Give yourself time to get your work to a stage that is going to impress.

I'll give you a recent example of a feature I had been working solidly on for about eight weeks last year, from the first rough draft to a second more complete version. I was really pleased with it and I left it alone for three months and last week sent it to a director I know for his feedback. What he had to say was invaluable and I quote...

"I think it’s a little too idyllic for the subject matter. Everything seems to be a bit too perfect and easy for someone who’s gay and coming out in the countryside in the 60s. The only real tension comes from the two bullies. Everyone seems pretty accepting of Toby. His real obstacle seems to come from himself accepting, but there doesn’t seem to be too much soul searching."

And because I've had that space from the screenplay I can also see that now, I even saw it when I reread it, before I even looked at the director's notes. His feedback just confirmed what I was already thinking. So of course the next rewrite will concentrate on the point he raised.

So once you've had a gap away from your screenplay say after a month, maybe two, open your document again and reread it, making notes as you go. Write down where you think the screenplay is weak and what you can do to improve it. Then, and only then, read your feedback notes, at least twice. Compare those notes to yours and make further notes if you need to. Then put it all away again for a couple of days.

When you come back to your screenplay read it again and the notes. By now the notes would have sunk in and you should have a very good idea of where the screenplay falls short. The rewrite will now be a lot easier. When it's done you'll have a well rounded script. Of course the more times you can repeat this the better your script is going to get. I would suggest doing this at least three times. When you see the amount of constructive criticism reducing then you know your screenplay is ready.

Have fun and happy writing.

RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM INSIDE MY HEAD

I don't have a blog planned for today. Not that I didn't try to come up with an idea for one but all the ideas I had didn't seem right, or didn't quite work. That's just typical of writing sometimes.

The last three weeks I've been working as a script editor for a producer friend of mine, on a feature due to shoot in the summer. It was a tough ask considering where the script was, but the writer showed her worth by working super hard, listening to the ideas I had for changes and she managed to finish the script in less than the twenty-one days we were asked to do it in. It was great to work with another writer who showed such passion and an openness to listen to someone else's ideas and suggestions. And it was a pleasure for me to read each act as she sent it to me. It was a delight to watch a writer grow in confidence right in front of my eyes.

'Hope' is a word I hated when I was a new writer. Waiting to hear back from producers and agents used to drive me mad and I would be checking my email every minute or so. I've learnt over the last two years while writing for film that nothing ever happens quickly. All four projects are moving forward at their own pace and I'm happy about that. If they weren't moving forward then I would be worried. I have other things to get on with anyway, one spec comedy feature to finish off and a spec thriller feature to start, so it's not as if I'm sat here twiddling my thumbs waiting for something to happen. And that's not counting the meeting I have on the 3rd with another production company.

Hmm, I think I might be drinking too much coffee. Several years ago I was drinking ten cups a day and stopped because it kept me awake at night. I started drinking coffee again six-months ago and although I only drink two or three a day I'm worried my body is getting used to it. I don't want to be drinking ten mugs a day again. Besides my body doesn't really like caffiene. Letting me drink strong black coffee is like giving a six-year-old a kilo bag of sugar and a spoon. It's not going to end well.

Staples are delivering later. I need more index cards. Indeed I feel quite anxious I have less than twenty left. Checking the window every few minutes to see if I can spot the TNT van. Hurry uppppppppp, I want my stationery fix.

Out for a drink tonight with a couple of writers. They buy me beer so I let them pick my brain about writing...I'm nice like that. Then tomorrow I'm meeting up with an award winning director. His current feature is doing rather well. Would be great to work with him in the future.

My agent is awesome.

So is my wife, as she proof reads everything I write. My spelling is that awful.

Hmm, think the coffee has sunk in now, so I apologise if things get too random.

Who's booked up for Danny Stack's course at Lighthouse, Poole in February???? If you haven't, book up now. Well worth the money and you'll learn loads.

Wonder if I should change my office around? It's been like this for six years. I really want a new desk, this one is too small.

I actually got complemented yesterday by a gay producer I know for coming up with the line, "sodamisin' spunk sponge," for a feature script of his. He replied via text saying, "I love it. I think it's original homophobic! LOL!" I aim to please.

I've put on too much weight over Christmas and sitting at my desk all day doesn't help. I'm two stone heavier than I was three years ago. Must exercise.

I need a new Mac, this one is playing up...and more stationery!

Swapping back to Sky Fibre tomorrow. Farewell forever BT, you sucked big time.

Right, must get on with this one pager I promised a producer would be done by 11am.

Happy writing.

ADVENTURES IN LA_LA LAND by Tim John

So what is it like to live the writer's dream, move to LA and work in Hollywood? English screenwriter Tim John tells us how it is in his new book Adventures In LA-LA Land.

The book covers every aspect of Tim and his family's adventures from arrival at US customs, buying a house, meeting stars, dealing (or not) with LA wildlife, the hot weather, the wrong parts of town, Halloween and many more curious things. It's not just a book about the Hollywood movie machine, it's a guide for surviving what is considered by many the craziest place in the US, and therein lies the book's beauty and allure.

I have to be honest I was expecting, and would have liked, more detail on the Hollywood side of things, meetings, stars and studio execs, how to handle them and survive in such a rollercoaster business. After all that's why Tim went to LA in the first place, to write movies and get paid for the privilege and I would have liked a little more insight into that area. However, it didn't really matter the book was a little short on horror stories from the studios, because it was such an enjoyable read from start to finish. It constantly entertained and was difficult to put down, even when I knew one in the morning wasn't a good time to still be reading and I should probably get some sleep.

Tim weaves his tales like the experienced writer he is, allowing the reader to discover for themselves the absurdity and wonder of the west coast of America without having to force his own brand of humour on them. And that's refreshing.

There's a section in the book to cover every aspect of living in LA and my favourite has to be, 'Family Matters,' with several chapters dotted throughout the book. It was great to read how each member of the family coped in LA and how Tim's job affected them, how they grew as people, the highs, the lows, the setbacks they experienced, the joys, the surprises and everything that made their seven years over there personal to them.

It's a fantastic journey and one I would recommend reading about. Go and buy the book, it'll make a welcome addition to your screenwriting bookshelf.

SET YOUR GOALS FOR 2014

A New Year! A new start! But what goals are you going to set for your writing career this year? Do you set them high? Do you set them low? What's realistic and what's not? Let's examine your choices.

Aim high or low? I guess there's nothing really wrong with aiming high but as long as it's realistic. If you're a new writer and you set yourself the task of winning an Oscar, it's not going to happen...sorry!. Realistic could be aiming to land a commission for an episode on Holby or Doctors. That depends of course, on where your career is at. If you only started out last year and have only a partially finished feature it's highly unlikely anyone from TV will look at you. You could still keep the Holby and Doctors goal but how bad would you feel if you didn't realise it? It's all about keeping motivated and if you make it difficult for yourself you'll lose that motivation. Set your goal high by all means but set it so it is achievable. That may include getting a couple of short film scripts made, place well in two or three competitions, or simply finish that feature you started last year and write another. If you set your sights realistically you won't be discouraged when you don't meet them.

Aiming too low can also be bad for your motivation. If you're a writer with a reasonable track record and you set you goal to get an episode of Doctors and you actually get seven, you might begin to think you're a writing genius, or get over confident and become complacent. Mistakes will creep into your work and then when things go quiet again you'll start to wonder where it all went wrong. Disillusionment and a lack of motivation become your old friends again. If last year you wrote two episodes of Doctors aim for four this year. If you wrote a feature, aim for two in 2014.

Don't stretch yourself too much and equally don't make things too easy for yourself. Set realistic goals that you know you have a good chance of achieving, that way by the end of 2014 you'll be pretty pleased with what you have accomplished and be motivated for 2015.

My goals this year are to see one of my four features go into production, to write a TV episode and have it broadcast, and to write one spec feature and one spec TV pilot. Achievable goals? Not too low or too high? They are very realistic I think. Anyway, we'll see how well I do at the end of the year.

But what about you? What are your goals for 2014? Please share below.

Happy New Year everyone!

SO THIS IS CHRISTMAS...

This will be my last blog until 2014, as I've promised myself I'll be taking Christmas off after all my hard work over the year. And what a year it's been... it's been quite exhausting. Here are the highlights.

• I was commissioned for two feature screenplays PLAYGROUND and COWBOYS CAN FLY.
• PLAYGROUND has been a big hit with all those who have read it both here and in the US, and it now has a Hollywood co-producer. Their agent at WMA also loved it.
• Ruby TV are interested in me and my work, and I met up with them to pitch ideas in August.
• Drama Republic have also shown a strong interest in me an my work and want me to come in for a chat, which will hopefully happen early next year.
• I had a lunch meeting this month with CBBC to discuss my work and listen to what they are looking for. They have requested I send them one page pitches of my ideas in January.
• I was one of a select group of people invited to a workshop by the BBC Writersroom with Adrian Hodges, the writer and exec producer of the BBC's new action & adventure show The Musketeers coming in January 2014.
• I was also commissioned for a 30 minute short script with no dialogue, which I found not only a challenge, but also refreshing. It was a very enjoyable job.
• I successfully pitched a football sitcom, created with my co-writer Brendan O'Neil, to commissioning editor Jon Montague of Sky and he requested the pilot episode and series bible.

Besides all those wonderful things I have two spec projects I'm working on with directors who I'm keen to work with, two TV series I'm working on with other writers and I've also been asked to script edit another film for the producer of COWBOYS CAN FLY.

All the above shows what you can do with a lot of hard work and some dedicated networking. I'm looking forward to finding out what 2014 has in store for me.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all, and may all your endeavours in 2014 be successful.

Now tell me, what have you achieved in 2013?

CHRISTMAS BOOK RECOMMENDATION

A really great read for writers of any level.

I received my copy of the deliciously outspoken Lucy V Hay's book a couple of months ago and I've only just finished reading it. The reason; because it was jam packed with so many ideas, information and valuable insights I wanted to make sure I had absorbed it all before I commented on it.

Followers of Lucy's blog and various other scribblings scattered over the interwebs will know she is always a fantastic source of information, dedicating herself to helping other writers with useful articles and discussions. It's no surprise then that someone eventually asked Lucy to prove she knew what she was talking about and write a book. Thus Writing & Selling Thriller Screenplays was born...or rather written.

Lucy V Hay: She knows stuff!

The book is split into three parts. The first focuses on what a thriller is. Thriller is a very loose genre term which actually contains a multitude of sub genres, all of which Lucy looks at in great detail, inviting the reader to think about how many there actually are. I was surprised.

The second section explores how to write a thriller, from picking your sub genre, the logline, the outline, the characters, the first ten pages and setup, the conflict to the showdown. The great thing about Lucy's book is that it doesn't just tell you HOW to write a thriller, it invites you to think over things yourself, using various examples and quotes from established writers, script editors and readers.

The third and final section was the one I found most interesting. Writers, of all levels, rarely think about the actual business of selling and making a feature, or TV screenplay. To me it's fascinating. Here Lucy examines how the industry works, and makes some suggestions on how to make it work for you. I love this section because I feel that to be a great writer you need to know how everything works around you. I don't think it's enough just to write a screenplay, hand it over to a producer and then forget about it. Knowing what is involved in production, from attracting named actors to budget issues helps a writer to give their screenplay the best chance of getting made. It's all invaluable information that every writer should be keen to learn.

Lucy sums up each topic of the book at the end of each section, so there's a handy reminder to quickly access if you don't have time to read the whole section, or simply just for a quick reference. And at the back there is what I consider to be the largest list of valuable resources I think I have ever seen listed on paper.

All in all a jolly wonderful and informative book that's a must on any writer's Christmas list. Get it! Read it! Learn from it! Enjoy! Shazam!

THE WORKING WRITER with DANNY STACK

Danny Stack - sharing his knowledge with keen screenwriters.

So today I will mostly be pimping the legend that is Danny Stack, or more precisely his writing workshop held on Sunday 15th December at Lighthouse Poole.

If you're at university studying scriptwriting, or you've recently graduated and are wondering what to do next, or you simply want to learn more about what it takes to be a writer, then this workshop is a must for you. It's essential in fact, as your writing career, or the lack of it, depends on whether you go and listen to what Danny has to say. Yes, his information 'IS' that important.

I personally owe Danny a lot for the advice he has given me over the years, it really helped me to grow my career. His advice comes from years as a working writer and I've always found it to be spot on.

Here's a little about the course...

The Working Writer Workshop led by Danny Stack

Sunday 15 December 10am - 5pm

Tickets £85 - Students or Seniors £72

If you’re interested in screenwriting, then this new one-day workshop will cover how to get started and how to get ahead. 

Join local screenwriter Danny Stack (whose credits include EastEnders, various children's series and the new Thunderbirds reboot for CiTV) where he’ll reveal his tips and insights on how ‘the system’ works and how you can make it work for you, from getting an agent, your first commission, and everything in between… and beyond! 

You won’t find this information in books or seminars anywhere else. This is a proactive, honest and practical look at how to survive as a working screenwriter. 

The course will be particularly useful for those who already have some screenwriting experience but beginner screenwriters will also benefit from the shared insights and practicalities, all of which will help towards getting that first writing payslip.

Think you can't afford it? If you're serious about wanting a career then you simply cannot afford 'NOT' to go.

Why even attempt to try and learn this stuff yourself, spend months, years struggling to find writing work when Danny can show you the way in a seven hour workshop. Believe me I wish there had been a course like this when I left university back in 2001, it would have saved me 6 years of heartache and got my career off to a much quicker start.

Don't delay, book your tickets now. You're a noodle if you miss out!

EMOTION

So somewhere in one of my recent blogs I seem to remember mentioning the words 'emotionally honest', but what does that actually mean?

I read a lot of new writers' screenplays through my reading service and the one major thing I notice is the lack of 'emotional honesty' in their work. Too many characters simply spit out lines that sound cool, usually with a flippant or jokey tone or attitude, which rarely do anything to enhance character. When I use the word emotion I don't mean characters simply getting angry, shouting, hitting out, or that so over used cliche of the single tear running down a character's cheek. As a writer you have to dig deeper.

In every scene you have to ask yourself...

• What are the characters' goals?
• How will they go about achieving these goals?
• Who wins out at the end of the scene?

And most importantly...

• How do the characters feel and react to other characters' actions in their attempt to achieve their goals?

It wasn't until I learnt how to do this, how to keep the characters' actions and responses 'emotionally honest', that I started to receive a great deal more interest in my work. I finally understood there are many different emotions and many layers of each, which emotions and their strength and how they show themselves, all depends on who the character is. The key is knowing your characters well.

Here's a scene taken from my optioned screenplay FAITH. Michael has just suffered an epileptic fit and his sister, Faith, is cleaning him up.

INT. FAITH’S FLAT, BATHROOM - DAY 

Faith and Michael sit in the bath. 

Faith stitches the wound above Michael’s eye with a needle and thread.  Michael winces but doesn’t move. 

Scars cover Michael’s back, arms and chest, evidence of an old horrific beating. 

With the final stitch in, Faith tenderly washes away the blood. 

A gentle kiss and she wraps Michael into the comfort of her arms.

The scene illustrates just how close these two are. Despite the pain Michael lets his sister stitch up his wound... he trusts her to look after him. Equally Faith, once finished, kisses him gently and holds him tight in her arms to comfort him. That simple gesture alone speaks volumes about much she cares for him and the type of character she is. No words were needed. She didn't need to blurt out her concerns. She just had to hold him. And the old scars on his body hint at Michael being hurt in the past, adding another layer to a very powerful and emotionally honest scene.

Think more about each line of dialogue, each action and importantly the reaction of your characters. How can they help build emotion while keeping it real?

If someone's relative is killed most people wouldn't head off on a killing rampage, or try to extract revenge. Some would fall apart, stray, become lost, others would busy themselves so they didn't have time to think about things. A little extra care and thought could really make the difference to your characters and screenplay.

One book I recently discovered has been a great help in assisting this process is; The Emotion Thesaurus: A Writer's Guide To Character Expression by Angela Ackerman & Becca Puglisi. Although written with novelists in mind I have also found it translates well to screenwriting. Hunt a copy down and get working, and soon you'll be writing characters and scenes that readers won't be able to put down.

LSWF 2013 REPORT 4

Back again and I still haven't caught up with all my LSWF emails, so if I spoke to you at the festival and you haven't heard from me yet, I will be in touch soon...I promise.

And straight to the second session from Pilar Alessandra - Dynamic Dialogue.

Here's what the lady had to say on the subject.

• There should be no idle chit-chat in a screenplay, no greetings or anything like that, as all dialogue must have a goal, either to show character or move the screenplay along.

• Think of the many ways for a character to communicate and express themselves through dialogue. Below are some examples.
• Lying.
• Euphemisms.
• Interrogation.
• Flattery.
• Sarcasm.
• Joking.
• Anecdotes.
• Truth.
• Silence.

• Think about who has the power in the conversation. The one who has the silence 'ALWAYS' has the power.

• Think about what your characters want in the scene and how are they going to get it using a verbal strategy. This will drive their dialogue.

• Subtext: This gives cues to the audience about the real subject or truth of the conversation. Visual cues such as physical action can help, like a 'tell' that shows what the character is really thinking.

• To understand how subtext works in dialogue choose a couple of your characters at random and place them at a funeral. Then write three pages of dialogue without mentioning the name of the person who has died and the words FUNERAL, DEATH, DYING, COFFIN, VICAR and MOURNING. This is good practise and will help you improve.

• As above keep away from key words in your dialogue, this will help avoid exposition. Talk around a subject not directly of it.

• Think about how people talk. Here are a few ideas to help stop your characters sounding the same.
• Where are they from?
• What is their background?
• What is their job? They will likely drop words into conversation associated with their profession. The language of profession. Do they speak lawyer, doctor, or road-sweeper?
• What are their likes?
• What are their goals?

• Avoid trying to write accents, use phrases instead, then your dialogue will be truer to character.

• Think about a characters' verbal rules. Do they...
• Swear lots?
• Apologise all the time?
• Use sarcasm a lot?
• Talk slowly?
• Talk loudly?
• With pauses?
• Use the wrong words?
• Rant?

• What is your characters' rhythm of speech?

• Casting your characters mentally also helps to find their voice. Clint Eastwood would say the same line differently to Jim Carey. This will also change how the scene plays out.

• It's sometimes helpful to think which instrument your character might be. Piccolo = fast and high pitched. Double bass = booming and slow.

• To avoid long speeches in a screenplay, or monologues, write it down in full, then pick the one line from it that sums it all up. It saves on over using dialogue. For example in Rambo our overly muscled hero is listening to an aid worker give her reasons for why she wants to go into a war zone to help people. In the original screenplay Rambo gave a long speech detailing the many reasons the aid worker should not cross the border, including rape, torture and death. In the end the speech was cut with only the last line remaining, "Go home!" Those two words have much more impact than a whole speech effectively saying the same thing.

• Think about what genre you are writing in. This will also affect your dialogue. Comedy = funny one liners. Thrillers = over talking loses tension.

• Your characters will play games with their dialogue, games they don't realise they are playing. Take the line, "Tell me you love me." Now without using it write three pages of dialogue where one character is trying to get the other to do exactly that. How do you play it? Who wins and how?

• There are other ways of getting around exposition. In The King's Speech the voice coach gets the King to talk about a traumatic childhood event by singing it. In another film, I can't remember the name, to get away with a large chunk of exposition the scene was written with the Pope swimming laps in the Vatican pool, while a Cardinal walked up and down talking and keeping pace. Think how wonderfully visual that was.

• Remember with genres there must be what Pilar called a 'button' at the end of dialogue in a scene. With drama there should be a cliffhanger and with a thriller you must, '"seal the deal."

As ever Pilar's advice is brilliant and spot on. I love this lady! I might even buy her book. There is a lot in this post for even an experienced writer to think on. After all it never hurts to brush up on your skills.

One more small report to come which I will probably upload Friday. Laters!

LSWF 2013 REPORT 3

And so having finally hunted down a few of the delegates I wanted to meet up with I then decided, on a whim, to drop in to Pilar Alessandra's How To Write To Maximise Impact session.

I've never been one for script gurus and have always been a bit suspicious of them, but I was hearing good things about Pilar and her sessions and I'm happy to admit I wasn't disappointed. Most of what she talked about I already knew, I've been writing for 12 years after all, although I did pick up a few nuggets of valuable information, and it's always good to get someone else's view on things.

To illustrate Pilar's advice I'm going to use made up examples, so please excuse me if they're rubbish, they are just to show what I'm trying to say and not intended to win an Oscar.

Pilar's Suggestion 1 - "The action line is the setup, the dialogue is the punchline."

That idea stood out for me because I'm about to do a second rewrite on a comedy script and I realised there is far too much dialogue in the screenplay, so it was a poignant reminder that action can speak louder than words.

Joey flies into a rage, smashes the office to pieces in front of Rich and Dave.

DAVE: What an idiot.

RICH: Yeah... he does realise that's his laptop he's jumping on and not yours?

DAVE: Let's just wait until he calms down and then you can tell him.

Gradually Joey's rage subsides and he slumps to the floor.

Dave and Rich survey the damage.

DAVE: No way I'm clearing that up.

Which suddenly Becomes...

Joey flies into a rage, smashes the office to pieces in front of Rich and Dave, who watch impassively.

The chair... smashes through the window.

The desk... becomes kindling.

The filing cabinet... torn papers fly everywhere.

The laptop... he jumps up and down on it, the keys splinter off in every direction.

Gradually Joey's rage subsides and he slumps to the floor in a heap.

Dave and Rich survey the damage.

DAVE: No way I'm cleaning that up.

Pilar's Suggestion 2 - "Don't use BEAT, use action to replace it."

I don't often use 'BEAT' or 'PAUSE' in my screenplays but I have noticed a lot of new writers do. A screenplay looks better and reads better without them.

MARCUS: Do you love me?

BEAT.

JANET: I don't know.

Will then become...

MARCUS: Do you love me?

Janet walks to the window, stares out blankly.

JANET: I don't know.

Pilar's Suggestion 3 - "Stopping to explain something ruins the pace."

Action should be short, efficient and to the point, especially in moments of high tension.

Dave yanks the brown, suede leather steering wheel, slides the car, a battered brown Capri with a smashed wing mirror and front number plate hanging off, around the corner. He barely misses two pedestrians, a man in his early thirties wearing a coffee brown suit, and a woman tottering along in bright red heels.

Then becomes...

Dave yanks the steering wheel, slides the car around the corner, barely misses two pedestrians.

Pilar's Suggestion 4 - "Don't be afraid to use minor sluglines to keep things moving."

Don't reset your scene every time or it will slow things down and really irritate the reader.

INT. ALAN'S HOUSE, HALL - DAY

Alan opens the door.  Simon barges past him.

SIMON: Where is she?

Simon exits another door.

INT. ALAN'S HOUSE, LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Simon enters. Sees she's not there, exits quickly.

INT. ALAN'S HOUSE, KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS

Simon enters, skids to a halt.  Janet sits at the kitchen table, her head in her hands.

Then becomes...

INT. ALAN'S HOUSE, HALL - DAY

Alan opens the door.  Simon barges past him.

SIMON: Where is she?

He storms through to...

LIVING ROOM

Sees she's not there, rushes in to...

KITCHEN

And skids to a halt.  Janet sits at the kitchen table, her head in her hands.

Pilar's Suggestion 5 - "Remember emotional responses to discovery."

If something happens how does your character react to it?

Nick steps out onto the roof.  Two hundred zombies face him down.  Nick quickly closes the door again.

Then becomes...

Nick steps out onto the roof.  Two hundred zombies face him down.  Nick pales.  He steps back and quickly closes the door.

Pilar's Suggestion 6 - "If you want to draw the eye to something, put it on its own line."

Simples!

Nick steps out onto the roof.  Two hundred zombies face him down.  Nick pales.  He steps back and quickly closes the door.

Then becomes...

Nick steps out onto the roof.  Two hundred zombies face him down.

Nick pales.

He steps back and quickly closes the door.

Pilar's Suggestion 7 - "Use CAPS sparingly. This is important!"

Remember, caps should only be used the first time a character is introduced, for mini sluglines and very rarely for anything else.

Don't...

MAX KICKS in the DOOR, SMASHES his fist into the DRUG DEALER's face, CRACKS his nose.

Do...

Max kicks in the door, smashes his fist into the Drug Dealer's face, cracks his nose.

Pilar Suggestion 8 - "The fight scene.  Emotion before the fight.  Emotion after the fight.  Who won?  Who has the power?"

1 - Emotion before the fight.
2 - Tone of fight.
3 - Method or weaponry.
4 - Fight move 1.
5 - Fight move 2.
6 - Upper hand.
7 - Winning moment.
8 - Emotion after the fight.

This is just a guide and there can be more fight moves if you need them. This can also be used for fights in dialogue or power games.

Lot's of great advice for new and experienced writers alike. A really great talk.

As much as I loved The Fall and Broadchurch sessions, Pilar's first session was the stand out one of the festival for me. That little lady is AWESOME!!!!!

LSWF 2013 REPORT 2

I hunted through the crowds of delegates to try and find those lovely people I had contacted before the festival and arranged to meet with. But with seven hundred people milling around the words needle and haystack came to mind.

Eventually after much exhaustive searching I settled for sitting down and listening to the extremely lovely John Yorke and the very talented Chris Chibnall chat about Broadchurch in the marquee. Unlike The Fall I had actually managed to catch up on all the episodes of Broadchurch before the festival, so I knew there would be no spoilers for me... I hate spoilers!

The first thing Chris Chibnall was keen to talk about was how Broadchurch was not a normal who-done-it. He deliberately wanted a strong emotional core and as with The Fall to focus on the emotion of loss rather than have anonymous victims. That was what I loved about both shows, Broadchurch especially; it was emotionally draining, very emotionally honest, as we witnessed how the death of the boy not only affected his family, but the community as a whole. Broadchurch could have been a community anywhere, even the community you or I live in, and that's what makes the show so appealing and unmissable.

I find that with crime drama, or any genre for that matter, the more of an emotional stake you have in the story, the more you emotionally connect with the victims, their family, their friends, as well as individual police officers with their own troubles, the more it has an impact on you. Broadchurch achieved this expertly. I'm not saying shows like A Touch Of Frost or Luther aren't worth watching because they don't explore who the victims were, because they are still very well written and extremely enjoyable and both are favourites of mine. What I'm saying is emotionally driven stories have a far greater impact and stay with the viewer for much longer.

The second thing Chris drew attention to were the red herrings. He pointed out they were actually smaller plot arcs playing out alongside the main one, with separate emotions, all of which were resolved emotionally at their end. During the series each character had two secrets; a personal one and one from the night of the murder, all of which had to be tied up by the end of the series.

The third thing Chris mentioned that stood out for me was that he was pleased with the quality of cast he was able to get, even those who didn't have much screen time, as they helped to make the series. He put this down to writing strong characters, great parts and powerful speeches that actors would want to play. Chris pointed out Pauline Quirke signed on despite her character having very few words of dialogue until later episodes, none in the opening one, simply on the strength of the character.

Another truly enlightening talk and extremely enjoyable. I can't wait to see what Chris Chibnall comes up with for the second series.

LSWF 2013 REPORT 1

I had a first draft commission deadline to complete for the Monday before the festival so I didn't get as much time to prepare as I would have usually. Still, as I travelled up to London on the Thursday morning by train I felt as prepared as I was going to be for the weekend, and as usual my excitement grew.

After four feature commissions in the last two years I had already decided to concentrate on TV at the festival, focusing my pitching and my schedule on British TV drama. The festival didn't disappoint.

First up for me was crime drama with the producer Gub Neal and writer Allan Cubitt of The Fall. If anyone hasn't seen The Fall them my question has to be 'why not'? It is unmissable crime drama, brilliantly written, ingenious even, delivered by producer Gub Neal, the man responsible for some of the most iconic crime series on British TV over the years. You have no excuse not to watch it.

So I sat down in the room eager to hear what they had to say. Allan started off by explaining how thoroughly he researched every aspect of the show before he began to write, going far deeper into the research than he needed to do so. He explained he did this because he wanted the research to bring a real truth to the series, to how the police react at crime scenes and especially how the killer would act not only with his victims, but also at home with his family. He pointed out if a real detective walked into a crime scene and lifted up a piece of evidence with a pen, like you see in so many crime shows both here and in the US, the crime scene would instantly be compromised.

Allan approached the script from an unusual angle quickly deciding he didn't want to create a guess 'who done it' crime show, but instead reveal who the killer was from the start and create the suspense and intrigue by not revealing why he does it. He explained that with a 'who done it' there is a lot of exposition, especially at the end when the crime is solved piece by piece to a room full of potential suspects and the culprit is finally revealed, where they conveniently tell why they did it. Allan wanted to avoid this at all costs, instead allowing the drama to come from showing the killer's home life and his sense of detachment, despite him being married with two kids. The characters start from where you don't want them to be and this is much more interesting, which is why the killer is shown with his family.

He went on to explain that in real life killers spend roughly 3% of their time killing, the rest of their time has to be filled with something, usually normal, daily activities. Showing the killers' family life, and how detached he is from it and them, helps to balance this and allows more of an insight into the mind of the killer. It also helps to keep the killings realistic, so there isn't a massive trail of dead bodies left behind by the killer.

The show concentrates on the moral accountability and not anonymous victims like other crime shows do. The audience learns as much about the victims as they do the killer and the cops, so the deaths have more impact and aren't frivolous. By doing this Allan drew the audience in because they can believe it might happen to them, has indeed happened to others, making the story more relevant to the viewers' lives. Could a killer be living next door to us, leading a perfectly ordinary life? It's possible and  a very scary thought.

Allan went on to say he deliberately didn't show any back story for Gillian Anderson's character, instead revealing who she is through her actions. Sometimes things can be left unsaid and unresolved, as with the ending. Gillian Anderson's character was also created with a sense of detachment, from her fellow officers and relationships, to show her likeness with the killer. Her character and the killer are also all about to control, control from different sides of the fence.

A great talk, very insightful, very informative and fantastic to see Gub Neal doing what he does best.

More on Wednesday.

BLOG REWIND - LSWF PREPARATION

15 days and counting...

The London Screenwriters' Festival 2013 is almost upon us and what better way to celebrate this than by rewinding the blog back to October 2012 and my very helpful LSWF preparation guide.

Follow the link and enjoy :-)

How To Prepare For The LSWF

THE FIRST DRAFT

Work began last week on the first draft of a new commissioned feature.

I love first drafts, the freedom to explore plot and character, seeing what works, what doesn't, and experiencing those moments of pure joy when the screenplay almost writes itself. Oh yeah, and it's hard work. How do I currently write a first draft? Like this...

The way I work can change from script to script, although there is usually a familiar structure in there somewhere.

First of all comes the treatment. I use this to make sure the producer and I are on the same wavelength. There's nothing more embarrassing than to finish a first draft and find out I've gone off on a tangent, away from what was originally discussed. This has happened to me once before, a basic error, one I'm determined to never repeat. The treatment is really a rough outline, 6-12 pages in length, to make sure the inciting incident and the turning points are all there and the story,  characters and their arcs work. The treatment is a guideline, my version of what I'm going to write, and it will change, sometimes drastically, with each draft. But at least looking at the treatment the producer knows where I want to go with the idea. I'll usually get a few notes and have to change some parts, but once the producer's happy then it's on to the next stage.

Characters. I spend as much time on my characters as I can, because if I don't get these right then the screenplay won't work. So I work on their background, their personality, how they talk, what influences them, what drives them and more importantly what their major flaw is. I know I'm happy with my characters when they become as familiar to me as my real life friends.

Index cards. Forty of them to be precise. I love index cards. I use them to scribble the major points, or incidents of my plot on and then play around with them until I'm happy with their order. They don't have to be detailed, they are just a guide to make sure I'm hitting every turning point, etc.

First draft time. I'll work from the index cards, crossing them off as I go and use the treatment if I need more detail. I try and aim for 5 pages a day, although I've done 30 in a day once, aiming to have the first draft completed in around 21 days. This then usually gives me a week or two to play around with the draft, check the character arcs, the dialogue and give the screenplay a quick spruce up.

Then I send it off, get my notes and a whole new level of writing begins...the rewrite!

ASSASSIN BEGINS SHOOTING

Good news for Danny Dyer fans, his latest feature began filming yesterday, Tuesday 17th September 2013. I'm really looking forward to this one as Danny is now choosing meatier roles than he has done in the past, moving away from the cockney wideboy characters he is well known for. I wish JK, Danny and the cast and crew all the best, and let's hope this film is a cracker.

Hitman thriller Assassin starts shooting, more cast announced

London - Production has commenced on hitman thriller ASSASSIN written and directed by JK Amalou and produced by Jonathan Sothcott. The film stars Danny Dyer, Martin Kemp and Gary Kemp. It is the first time the Kemp brothers have starred together in a film since cult classic The Krays.

Holly Weston (left) and Anouska Mond (right) join the cast of Assassin.

In addition it is announced today that Anouska Mond (ill Manors), Holly Weston (John Carter), Eddie Webber (The Firm), Robert Cavanah (Fall of the Essex Boys) and Deborah Moore (Die Another Day) have joined the cast. “I think JK and I have put together a really cool cast,” says producer Sothcott, “I have had my eye on Anouska Mond for some time, I think she’s really got something about her.” Amalou adds “we searched long and hard looking for our leading lady but as soon as I met Holly Weston I knew she had what it took to play the complex part of Chloe. The female characters play a bigger part in our story than is usual in films of this type and I really feel we have nailed the casting.”

The movie, which will be distributed in the UK and Australia by Anchor Bay, will be filmed on location in London, Sussex and Surrey. “I want to show a side to London that isn’t just Soho and Canary Wharf,” says JK Amalou, “really make the city into a character. But I also want to get out of London, life extends beyond the City.”

Assassin tells the story of Jamie (Dyer), a professional hitman hired to kill corrupt politician Tony Boyd (Cavanah) by mobsters John and Lee Alberts (Gary and Martin Kemp). The night of the hit he meets Chloe (Weston) and begins an affair with her, only to discover that she is Boyd’s estranged daughter. Spurred on by her friend Alex (Mond), Chloe begins to think that Boyd’s death was not the accident it appears and when she begins digging, the Alberts hire Jamie to kill her too. As his world collapses around him, Jamie has to chose between survival and the girl he loves in an action-packed climax that can only end one way – death.

Assassin is a Richwater Films/Silver Leaf Productions co-producion.

About Richwater Films

Richwater Films is a London-based independent film production company with interests in publishing, music and multimedia. Richwater’s first film, vigilante drama Vendetta, is released to UK cinemas in November. Upcoming projects include Top Dog for Universal, We Still Kill The Old Way for Anchor Bay, big budget action pic Renegades and London terrorism thriller Age of Kill.